Lekker Mzansi

Chances are high that you are part of the 99.3% of the world’s population that have absolutely no idea what the title of this blog post means.   And if by chance you belong to the other 0.7% (which equates to 50 million, or the population of South Africa), you’ll probably be thinking “What’s the big deal, that’s pretty straightforward?”  Which is really what inspired me to write this blog, which is to provide a personal perspective on South Africa, given that the rest of the world knows surprisingly little about this country, and that locals possibly know even less about how the rest of the world perceives them.  So I thought it would be interesting to provide an outsider’s inside take on this beautiful and intriguing land, and what I believe makes it really unique.

My family and I lived in Johannesburg (Joburg or Jozi for short) for 3 years.  For those who don’t know much about that place—no, we did not have 24x7 police protection, nor were we in solitary confinement during our time there.  Joburg is not a war zone, though it can become one based on the performance of the national rugby, cricket or soccer teams.  Crime is something that everyone talks about constantly (and also something that sustains a large and rapidly growing security industry), so it’s no surprise that this perception exists.  Fortunately, my nearest “crime experience” was during my joining formalities, which included a 30 minute lecture from my employer’s head of security about “what to do in case you are car-jacked”, in which I was introduced to the “panic button”, a cleverly concealed contraption hidden in the driver’s seat reachable with one hand, which you are supposed to press to trigger a silent alarm with the security company in such a situation (questions about how many people actually have the presence of mind to do this remained unanswered).   What I remember most about this discourse was not the content, but rather the professionalism and clarity with which this was expounded, matter of fact and to the point, almost like a mother checking that her kid had properly packed his bag for school and hadn’t forgotten anything.  I don’t particularly recall what I felt when I first heard this, except to think that my employer was very smart in providing these tips after the employment contract had been signed.  However, while crime unfortunately exists (and we have heard many stories in our time there), it is NOT the defining characteristic of either this city or country, popular perception notwithstanding. 

One thing that continues to be a dominant characteristic of life in South Africa, given the country’s history, is race.  Which on a day to day basis means that every document one has to fill in has a section on it— you are required to tick a box next to “Black, White, Indian, Coloured”.  I was actually quite excited when I saw this the first time, as it proved unequivocally that India was ahead of both China and Pakistan on the world stage (in this case South Africa it must be said), two countries we share a constant rivalry with, one on the economic field and the other on the cricket pitch, and neither of whom were mentioned.  I wondered which box people from these countries would tick, and by a process of elimination the only option left was “Coloured”.  This again is reflective of how little the world knows of South Africa, and vice versa.  The term “coloured” refers to people of mixed race, and is perfectly acceptable in common use, as locals know what it means.  But it can be construed as being offensive to people from other parts of the world, i.e. those who are neither black nor white nor Indians.  So I guess all the Chinese in South Africa are “coloureds”, as are our neighbours from the sub-continent, and the Japanese, and Koreans, and Mexicans, and…

Which brings me to 2010, and the year that the world discovered South Africa, or so all of us living there hoped.  The Soccer World Cup was meant to announce the arrival of the “S” in “BRICS” to the world stage, and dispel myths that the world held about Africa in general, and South Africa in particular (yes we are part of Africa, but much better!).  I still remember some fantastic radio ads of Nandos (a local fast food chain) at that time, which basically asked local White people to hide in their homes (and order Nandos take-aways) so as not to disappoint visiting foreigners, for whom Africa, including South Africa, was a country of “dark” people, and wildlife. While the World Cup was universally acclaimed as a success, I sometimes wondered whether it had achieved its objective of changing perceptions.  In my view, South Africa had got to host the World Cup, and in return had given the world the vuvuzela (an amazing musical device, it has the ability to drown out all other sounds, and the only way to withstand its auricular assault is to start blowing one yourself, which is why everyone in a soccer stadium either has a vuvuzela on their lips, or stays away).  But I knew South Africa had truly arrived on the world stage when I recently saw mini-vuvus, around half the size of the originals, being sold in Mumbai, and no doubt manufactured in China.  Imitation, as they say, is the best form of flattery—even though I doubt if anyone else in the world can blow a vuvuzela with the same passion as a Pirates or Sundowns supporter (popular local soccer teams).

I recently heard someone struggling with what to say in a farewell speech, and suggested that when in doubt, always say “it’s about the people”.  In my case, I have no such doubts.  What defines South Africa is not crime, nor race, nor its constant quest to be recognized as a legitimate world player—the country is defined by its richly pluralistic diversity of people.  It is not only the indigenous inhabitants, black and white both, who have contributed to this legacy of diversity, but also those whom the country has welcomed in its long history—from the slaves of the East Indies, to the plantation labourers from India, to the less fortunate from its neighbouring countries who come here for succor and sustenance, to those with capital and knowledge from the West and increasingly the East.  This is what gives this land its character, a melting pot which takes the best ingredients available and comes up with a delectable potjie.   And does this in its own unique way, drawing on its place as the seat of civilization, supplemented with the best from around the world. There’s no better way to describe this land than using the Afrikaans word for “great”—lekker—with the local slang for the country—“Mzansi”.  Lekker Mzansi is indeed a lekker place.